Even Greener Pastures

In the U.S. someone legally responsible for a child is called a "Guardian".  When we were in school we had to have reports from the school or notes from the teacher signed by a "Parent or Guardian" and brought back to school.  Letters from the school were addressed "To the Parent or Guardian of student NealC".

I can't say I heard the word "guardian" much in the UK, other than in reference to the newspaper. The most common phrase in the schools I worked in was "parents and carers".

When I heard the word, "Guardian" for the newspaper for the first time, and I thought it was about people who like gardening and I had believed it was magazines of about plants and flowers for a long time. Seriously!
One day, I saw a real Guardian at a book shop, I was surprised and took it. It astonished me in another way. I didn't understand the contents. It was too difficult.

How to call the person who is responsible (either by the family ties or by other commitments) for taking care about a child. I mean one word or phrase which may mean the parents, foster family, professional staff - whoever is engaged in taking care.
My son is preparing a poster for an international conference and needs to write (in a very few words) that the people who care about the child with disabilities should be properly educated. He refers a few time to these people, so he needs one short expression. In Polish we have "opiekun" from the verb "opiekować się" = "to care about". He found a word "caregiver" (or "carer"), but it sounded too professional to me. We checked in the dictionary and found this word is rather reserved to the professional healthcare workers.
I suggested him to write "parents (and other people caring about the child)" in the first place, and repeat only the word "parents" wherever he would need it.
Do you have any other suggestions? Is there an English word which encloses all people who may be involved in caring about the child?

Neal‘s suggestion of using the word guardian was one I was going to suggest, but notice the phrase is technically „legal guardian.“ A guardianship is a legal proceeding whereby someone substitutes, usually temporarily, in for a parent or parents and takes on the parenting role for a child pursuant to a court order and has all the legal rights of a parent, but doesn’t adopt the child and become a parent (like say both parents end up in jail for something and grandmother comes along and petitions to be the child’s guardian). I’ve done a few guardianships myself for people, but I avoid them at all costs (unless I am penniless) because they are a nightmare with the paperwork involved.

So, guardian has a particular legal connotation to it that probably is okay to overlook as a substitute word for parent. But it always calls to mind the legal formalities in my mind.

As an alternative, you could just use the word „caretaker.“ Who’s the child’s parent or caretaker? Caretaker is not a legal term and carries no legal significance. It might be someone a parent has dropped a child off with while the parent is unable to care for the child (for example, the parents are unavailable for any reason and drop the children off with the grandparents or one of the child’s uncles or aunts for awhile to look after the child).

You are correct in that you cannot use the word „caregiver“, because that word refers to someone looking after usually a sick, disabled or older adult, usually in some kind of care facility.

Quote from: SHL on September 11, 2019, 09:18:15 pm

As an alternative, you could just use the word „caretaker.“ Who’s the child’s parent or caretaker? Caretaker is not a legal term and carries no legal significance. It might be someone a parent has dropped a child off with while the parent is unable to care for the child (for example, the parents are unavailable for any reason and drop the children off with the grandparents or one of the child’s uncles or aunts for awhile to look after the child).

I'm confused. I always thought a caretaker looked after a building, not children. Ah, OK, I just looked it up, it's the American equivalent for the British "carer". That's funny because in the UK, caretakers fix things around the building.

caretaker

1. a person employed to take care of a large building, such as a school, and…

dictionary.cambridge.org

Yes, that’s right Nikola. I also looked up your British word carer in my German dictionary, since I had never heard that word before. A couple definitions, die Pflegekraft, der Pfleger, seem to fit our caretaker definition used in the US,  but then it gave an odd alternative translation, die Begleitperson, and next it and states: „ (esp. Br.) (person who accompanies a disabled person, e.g., to an event).“

 So, that last definition seemed a bit odd to me. So, I’m not sure how exactly the word „carer“ most often is applied in the UK.

In the US, to my knowledge, the word for the person who is the maintenance man for a building and looks after it, is sometimes called the „building superintendent“ or the „super“ for short. It’s actually a term I’ve only heard applied in a few TV shows, or movies I‘ve seen which were set on the East Coast of the US. Neal would probably be in a better position to say if this term is still applied frequently in the New York area or not. Out where I am, one rarely hears any particular word for a building superintendent used. Usually the person in charge of these duties has an official title the employer gives them, which could be any number of things. The term „building custodian“ used to be used, but I cannot say it still is heard very often because a „custodian“ is a word referring to a cleaning person in a building, especially a school. Someone cleaning the toilets and so on. Janitor was a word also used, but people have fiddled with the vocabulary over the years to find a nice euphemism for someone occupying the allegedly lowly position of being a cleaning person. I suppose there was some sort of supposed stigma attached to job or something.

Thanks SHL. I think that "caretaker" (in the American meaning) was a word I looked for. I've checked the British "carer" but it seemed to be synonymous with "caregiver".
Anyway my son already returned from his conference (at least I hope so, because I'm still at work).
On this occasion we came to the conclusion that the Green Zones spoil the joy of travelling in Europe by car... but it is a topic for another thread... maybe...

You are welcome Martin. Sorry if I was a bit late with that. I think my gallstones and the abdominal ultrasound I just had set me back a bit.

Good additional words for parents are:

Parent: Co-Parent

So, a mom is a parent and the dad we‘d call the co-parent (or vice versa). I think those words are good substitutes for simply „mom“ and „dad.“

Guardian: I‘d avoid the word myself unless I were talking about a legal guardian of a child appointed by a Judge as a temporary substitute for the parent. I‘ve had many people come in to me and say, „oh, I‘m the child’s guardian (say a grandmother).“ I immediately say, „Oh, that’s interesting. Can I see your guardianship papers please? When did the Judge sign the guardianship papers? And why?“ Then the person will say to me, „oh, we never went to court.“ Then I say, „well, then you are NOT the child‘s guardian, sorry to say. One of the parents can come along anytime he or she likes and just take the child away from you and there would be nothing you could do about it. If you called the police, they’d just ask to see the Guardianship Order and if you didn‘t have one, they’d just say, „well, I suggest you get one. Otherwise, there is nothing we can do for you.“

Caretaker. That words works in the US vernacular as a substitute for parent or legal guardian. That’s just someone taking care of and raising a child where the parent(s) are away, and with the consent of the parents. But, the parents can come back anytime they like and take the child back.

Those are the only words that come to mind. If I think of any others, I‘ll let you know. 

Quote from: MartinSR on September 12, 2019, 07:14:38 pm

Thanks SHL. I think that "caretaker" (in the American meaning) was a word I looked for. I've checked the British "carer" but it seemed to be synonymous with "caregiver".
Anyway my son already returned from his conference (at least I hope so, because I'm still at work).
On this occasion we came to the conclusion that the Green Zones spoil the joy of travelling in Europe by car... but it is a topic for another thread... maybe...

I think this is one of the cases where you have to decide between the British and American word, ideally based on the audience, and stick with it, accepting that you will satisfy one group of speakers and pass the completely wrong message to the other. This thread came just a few days too late and made me realise that I should have chosen my words a bit more carefully at a social gathering where speakers from America, the UK, Ireland and non-native speakers were present. I was talking about someone who used to work as a caretaker in a school, meaning the maintenance person in the building, but it hit me after reading this that half of them probably got the wrong impression, thinking he was looking after people.

Yes, I was going to include that point that Nikola raised. You always have to consider who your audience is when selecting a particular word to use, whether the audience is more familiar with British, US/Canadian and possibly also Australian English. These differences don’t matter so much between native speakers of English, because if an American heard a British person say „carer“ in the context of someone looking after a child, the context would make the meaning clear. Likewise, if an American used a phrase like „the child’s caretaker“ a British English speaker would not be confused and think the caretaker were someone responsible for taking care of a building.

Use of the unfamiliar word might trigger an odd look, and a question like, „what’s that? I‘ve never heard that before, that’s interesting“, but would not cause a communication problem. But, a non-native English speaker could certainly experience a bit more confusion.

But, as to the word „caretaker“ in the US, since this discussion arose, I recall one rare instance where I heard the word used in the US to refer to someone looking after a building. Its use would have to be quite rare on the West Coast, but I recall an old movie, The Shining, with Jack Nicholson (1980) where Jack Nicholson and his wife and son agree to look after a luxury hotel in Colorado, and live in it, while the hotel is closed for the winter because it is inaccessible due to snow several months of the year. It’s a rather bizarre thriller kind of movie, but the point is, Jack Nicholson takes on the job of the hotel‘s „caretaker“ during the snowed in winter season, according to people in the movie describing his duties.


That one old movie is the only example that comes to mind of someone using the word „caretaker“ to refer to someone looking after a building in the US, so I cannot say the use of the word in that context is totally unheard of. Only unusual.

It does get a little hard to define.
Guardian is definitely a legal word, that it why the school used it.  It could mean the child was legally adopted, or legally assigned to temporary foster care etc...  Steve is right it definitely something assigned by the courts.

Caretaker is ok, and appropriate if we are not talking about the legal guardian.  In the case of someone taking care of a disabled person it might work better than parent or guardian.

Caretaker is also used of someone taking care of a building, usually that building is unoccupied (except by him).  So Jack Nicholson was the winter caretaker for that hotel, made sure the pipes didn't freeze, no one broke in, etc...  You hire a caretaker because no one is around.

An occupied building would be taken care of by the 'custodian' or the 'janitor', he is the guy with the big set of keys on his belt.  An apartment building, at least here in NY, is looked after by the Superintendent (or NY slang "the Super").  He is usually a general handyman or fix it guy.