Even Greener Pastures

In Polish, there's also "kurcze pieczone", grilled chicken, which I find simply enchanting as a swear word. Plus, it's a sure way to make people laugh when I say it. 

In German, there's a sanitized version of almost every swearword I can think of:
Scheiße (****) -> Scheibenkleister ((window) pane glue) (Yeah, that makes about as much sense in German as in English.) or "Mist!" (dung)
Arschloch (****) -> Armleuchter (candelabra, candlestick)
verflucht (cursed) -> verflixt (like: cussed), with the extension of "Verflixt und zugenäht!", sort of like "cussed and sewn up"

The potentially offensive exclamation "(Du/Mein) Lieber Gott!" is mostly used to express awe, surprise or horror and can change to "(Du) Liebe Zeit!" (dear time), "(Du) Liebe Güte!" or "Meine Güte!" (dear/my goodness) or "(Du) Liebes Lieschen!" (dear Lizzie).

Bavarians are very much into religious curses which get changed or shortened out of all recognition: "Herrgott!" -> "Herrschaftsseiten!", "Kruzifix" -> "Zefix!"or "Zefixalleluja!", "Sakrament!" -> "Sakra!", "Jesus, Maria und Joseph" -> "Jessasmarandjosef!"
Interestingly, "Kruzitürken!" has nothing to do with modern day Turkish immigrants, and in fact, most people are very much surprised when told that Turkish people find that curse offensive. It's a leftover from the times of the Crusades and has lost all meaning - to Germans, that is. To us, it's just a generic swear word.